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dear george
George, George, George. You just won't back down over this illegal wire-tapping scandal, will you? You just will not admit that breaking the law is illegal even if you are the President. "We're at War!" you cry in defense. Well, can I use that too? Al Gore, the man you know full well should be sitting in your office right now, spoke today on the issue, saying that "a president who breaks the law is a threat to the very structure of our government." You responded by sending a lackey to give a press conference dismissing Gore, pointing out that Clinton also spied on citizens without a warrant. Nice move, George, because you know how much the public loved Bill, and that this is what will be shown on TV. What will not be reported by the right-wing media is that such acts were in fact legal at the time, and that it was Clinton who signed the bill that made it illegal, that made it so the government obtains a court order to eavesdrop on suspected criminals and terrorists. The law is there to protect the rights and liberties of the public - if you do not understand this, you have no right to govern. Ah, but you believe in the Unitary Executive, don't you! Most Americans of course have no idea what this is, or didn't until recent events exposed this little known Presidential power. You see, it means you can sign a law such as, say, banning torture - but then you can add your own little statement at the end that says "unless I think I need to". So you can actually bypass Congress, you can bypass the whole legal system, just because you have this little power that says you can be above the law. Excuse me, George, but isn't that a step towards dictatorship? You have said that it would be easier if this were a dictatorship, but you know what George? Being President is not supposed to be about having it easy. If you want to spy on people, you have to go through the right channels, so that the people who do all the checks and balances on the Government can see what you are up to. You should have nothing to hide! But your domestic spying campaign isn't just about seeing who is calling Pakistan or Iran, is it? It's about seeing who does not agree with your grip on power - anti-war demonstrators and so forth. You are actually taking away the very freedoms people think you are fighting to uphold. You must remember, George, that it is called the Bill of Rights, not the Bill of Privileges. At least it looks like you will be getting your man on the Supreme Court. Samuel Alito did a good job of avoiding difficult questions during the confirmation hearings, didn't he? Here is a man who has never ruled in favour of the little guy against the Government or big businesses, who believes that strip-searching a 10 year-old girl and her mother without a warrant in search of drugs and then disregarding their case of complaint is OK, who believes that Roe vs Wade is 'not settled law (meaning that abortion may once more become illegal in the US if he has his way) and who, when questioned about his past membership of a racist, misogynist, homophobic Princeton club, said he 'could not remember joining it'. Is he related to Kurt Waldheim or something? He remembered it clearly enough on his job application to the Reagan administration in 1985, in fact it had pride of place on his CV. I don't know about you, George, but I'm pretty sure that if I were in court, and I said I could not remember committing a crime or being a memeber of, say, the Ku Klux Klan or something, I am sure the evidence would be there to refresh my memory, and it would not just be dismissed. I bet if Bill Clinton had been a member there would have been a storm bigger than Katrina. Maybe Alito got involved in racist activity, but just didn't inhale? But hey, you gotta have your mates on board, eh George! After all, Alito is a huge supporter of your Unitary Executive. He believes in the 'Supremacy of the elected Branches of Government', meaning that he would probably, as Chief Justice, just stand aside and let you become Emperor. I watched Star Wars over the weekend, George, I'm sure you have seen it. In Episodes 2 and 3 the Senate gradually gives all its power to the Chancellor, until finally he is crowned Emperor, amid thunderous applause. Is that what you are after, George? I don't of course for a minute compare you to Darth Sidious, you are no way that intelligent. You're more like Salacious Crumb, Jabba's beady-eyed snickering little rat-friend, which of course makes Dick Cheney the Hutt. Perhaps I am being too hard on you, George, but hey that's the job of the people, isn't it? If the Democrats manage to filibuster Judge Alito, will you keep coming back with more and more controversial nominations, until the Senate gets tired and submits? The public is surely losing interest already, as the new season of TV shows kicks off, and Awards Season takes our minds off the disastrous effects of your administration. Don't feel bad though, George, it's like that in Britain too. With kind regards, and hoping to see you out on your arse in the near future your friend, pete
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18.1.06 09:45 |
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show me the monkey
A new show started tonight on CBS: Love Monkey. It is about a guy in New York who works for a record label and lives and breathes music, but is incapable of keeping a relationship. It is marketed as a kind of male Sex and the City, but dressed up in High Fidelity's clothes. I was curious, so watched it tonight to test the water - and the water was actually cold piss. Oh yes, it definitely wanted to be a bit High Fidelity, but without any of the humour or heart. In fact there were even a few lines lifted from Nick Hornby himself; if he isn't receiving royalties for this show, he certainly should be. The character's apartment even looks like that of John Cusack in the film. Over all it was a very poor, very cheap imitation that was written by people with absolutely no interest in music (throwing in endless Dylan references like cheap garnish on a dull salad does not make you cool). The plot seemed to be a schoolboy attempt at re-writing Jerry Maguire, and it failed miserably. As a viewer, I just did not care about any of the characters at all. Oh he lost his job? So what! He's not going to sign this Vernon Kaye lookalike singer? Who cares! He's splitting up with his girlfriend? I don't give a monkeys! |
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18.1.06 10:11 |
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spot the slimy piece of worm-ridden filth
felt pen, paper. salacious w bush twitters with glee at his master dick's lastest endorsement. |
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19.1.06 23:37 |
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je travaille, enfin
Personal news: so I have a new job! At the Avid Reader bookstore in downtown Davis, a small independent store; like my old Finchley job I'll be doing accounts, but also working in the shop. This means I will finally begin to interact with the citizens of the Republic of Davis. It's four days a week (at this point), and seems like a nice place. Of course, it gives me time to look for teaching work, too. And draw cartoons of George W Bush. They need a bit of work; there are three more years of Dubya to perfect them. Dear oh dear.
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23.1.06 19:24 |
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aye aye, captain
Martin Carr, the bravest and wirralest and radleyest of captains, is releasing his new album on the 30th FREE on his website (bravecaptain.co.uk). It's called 'Distractions'. If it's anything like the Fingertip Saints vol II (a permanently played CD chez pete) I'll be 'appy.
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23.1.06 19:35 |
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Week Seventeen: How to Have a Nice Day
Last week, in the Post Office, I was mailing a job application when the lady behind the counter told me that I needed to pay 23 cents more for postage than I had thought. I only had enough money fro the single stamp, so she told me I would not be able to mail my letter. Suddenly there appeared next to me a man with a handful of small coins, offering to pay for the rest of my postage. “Oh, er, thank you,” I mumbled apologetically. “No problem!” He beamed. “Someone else lent me some money today, so I’m repaying the favor! Have a nice day!” The cashier lady, not to be outdone for kindness, told me that she would even lick the stamp for me. Don’t push it, I thought to myself, but smiled, and went off and actually Had a Nice Day. ffice Despite all the vitriolic politics, despite the death sentences, despite the crazy right-wing media, you cannot deny that ffice:smarttags" />
The big culture shock of niceness has been on the buses. On one of our first days here, we got onto a bus and the driver actually asked the passengers if the air-conditioning made them too cold, or did they need it turned up at all. I nearly fell off my seat, trying to imagine that happening on a draughty double-decker in |
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24.1.06 22:49 |
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ffice" />|
Now this is funny - libelous claims about large corporations. With awful but hilarious MS Paint illustrations. You gots to see this. I especially like the libelous claim that says AT&T listen to every phone call - that is libel, surely, it's not AT&T, it's the NSA!
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25.1.06 11:24 |
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a million little pieces of crap
I thought I should write about the literary scandal that is gripping book enthusiasts all over America. How some guy called Jim Fry, who wrote a book about how he quit drugs, and was subsequently made a millionaire when Oprah endorsed his work, and how it turned out that he made loads of it up (like being in prison for 90 days when it had really only been four hours, and running over a cop, and stuff), and how when this had been revealed Oprah publicly turned her back on him while he was actually on the show today, and how tonight at my new job we had a book signing by this woman who used to actually teach writing to this Jim Fry bloke (her name escapes me - she had a book about vets, with a dog on the front - did you know, I have a policy never to read books that put dogs on the cover? Oh, except 'doga', of course), and how she spoke of her disappointment in Oprah and that nobody who knows literature really believes memoires anyway, and that all writers exaggerate, and that that isn't the point if he made millions telling people this was how he did it and that was how it was, but then again the whole memory thing is fuzzy anyway (just ask Sammy Alito), and how this whole episode has ramifications for all, and even for the blogs we read which purport to be about things people claim to have done, and whether truth is real or imaginary, and whether reformed drug addicts have to lie about lying to remain a good role model. I should write about that, maybe. The problem is, I don't actually care. I really don't care. I don't know if I should care; in fact, I don't even care if I should. |
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27.1.06 08:51 |
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Week Eighteen: Turning Thirty
In a week's time, I officially Turn Thirty. I'm not looking forward to it. Especially since, I am told, it's actually the law here that when you hit 30, you have to grow a goatee. Now I've been telling people that it aint gonna happen, I went through my 'beards' phase years ago, as all who rememeber me can attest. "Oh you say that now," people tell me. Yes I do say it now, and I'll be saying it next week too - the beards aint coming back! However, as if to prove the goatee-law, while watching the golf we noticed that Tiger Woods is now sporting a recently-hairy chin, and a quick google-search revealed that he turned thirty exactly a month ago. Insert golf-related joke here if you must, but it's got me worried. Can you get fined if you don't have one? Of course, there are other phenomena related to turning thirty Stateside. For one thing, you no longer have to prove your age when buying beer. Oh yes, if you are under 30, you get carded - even though the legal drinking age is 21. It is pretty ridiculous to say the least, especially in the supermarket when you know the person selling it to you is at least eight years younger than you and has no idea there was more than one President George Bush. Maybe people grow goatees as a social sign to prove their thirtigenarian status. Thirtigenarian, that is surely not a word? Well, it is now. I'm Turning Thirty, I say so. If 'twenty' rhymed with 'plenty', 'thirty' rhymes with 'dirty', which is not good. Well, it's better than 'warty', which rhymes with 'forty' - no disrespect to fortigenarians, of course. Thirty also rhymes with 'flirty', which I certainly am not, and 'shirty', which I kind of am. But the worst part about Turning Thirty is, and I'm serious here, that it is the name of a truly awful book by Mike Gayle (the former agony-uncle turned agony-inducing-author). I'd prefer to say I turning thirty-one than be identified with that absolute bum-wipe of a novel. In a one-line book review I'd write: Don't Ever Read This Dire Book, EVER. But that's just the Thirty-year-old Grumpy Old Man coming out, and he's always been there. So what can I expect from my thirties? The plans are to start a family with my wife, to have a career with my MA, and maybe who knows even finally learn to drive... Other than that, who can tell? I don't even know what to expect from my birthday itself - my wife has a surprise planned, which involves going somewhere the weekend before, and that's all I know. I'm intrigued! I love surprises - unless the surprise involves me waking up next Tuesday and deciding, "hmm, i think I'll only shave some of my face today..." |
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31.1.06 07:01 |
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